Saturday, March 17, 2007


Lunch begins with cucumber and parsley salad with red currant vinaigrette, then continues on to mustard chicken served with a medley of carrots and broccoli complemented by three-layer potatoes. To finish the meal there is chocolate raspberry mousse and coffee. You don’t eat much. Dinner begins when the girl behind the counter asks what you will have, and you say: “Double Cheeseburger Meal with coffee.” You are starving!

At lunch you feature a classic beige jacket with matching flared skirt, complemented with silver accents. Dinner finds you braless, in blue jeans, complemented by a stretchy barn-red shirt and the soft white sweater going to fuzz balls your mom wore in the hospital.

At lunch you make a less-than-two-minute speech to 750 people following a video clip that is all about you. And you hug your friends and your family and a few dozen strangers and thank them for coming. At dinner you sit across from the man who sat beside you at lunch and nobody says much of anything.

Suppose they made a video about your work, and invited a few hundred people, and they let you make your speech before lunch, thereby allowing you to eat without the butterflies or the fear of spilling food on your suit, and you could show up braless, in blue jeans, complemented by the stretchy barn-red shirt and the soft white sweater going to fuzzy balls your mother wore in the hospital. Now that would be an occasion to celebrate!

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