I was starved when they found me and missing one eye
My features encrusted, a canine mud pie
So they christened me “Pirate’ and fenced their front yard
With wire and picket they thought would be hard
To escape, but it isn’t. I crawl underneath
I engineer gaps with my paws and my teeth
If I could tell stories I’d keep them enthralled
With the places I’ve lived and the names I’ve been called
They sooth me with petting, they ply me with bones
They coddle me more than most kings on their thrones
I’m a paradogs daily, intending to stay
While incessantly plotting a fast get-away.
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